Wednesday 3rd June 2020
A lot has happened since my last diary update last week. Which is amazing, as normally nothing normally happens!!! The government announced last Thursday evening that schools would be opening on 1st June for year R, year one and year six. Which meant that it was time for us to make a decision about Holly. They also announced that from the 1st June, people can meet up outside up to a group of six. Plus we could meet in back gardens now, which was the best news. As it meant that I could take the girls over to see my parents and sit in the back garden,
Until the 1st June, we carried on as normal. The weather continued to be amazing and Andy had last Thursday and Friday off work which was just what we all needed. He was ready for break, as he hadn’t taken any time off since February. We spent time in the garden, and I painted the playhouse. I’m really pleased with it, it has completely changed the look of it. I still need to do a couple more coats on the white to cover the old paint.
On Sunday we headed to The White Horse Hill for a walk and a picnic. It’s somewhere that we’ve been to previously and we knew that it would be easy to social distance there and lots of space. When we arrived we were pleased to see it wasn’t too busy and it felt amazing to be out. Like it was just a normal day for us. I didn’t feel anxious about being around people, as there was just so much open space. We enjoyed our picnic and the girls loved it.
On Tuesday after the girls had finished their school work for the day, we went over to my parents back garden and had a picnic with them. We took our own picnic and Mum had set up the umbrella for us to sit under in the corner of the garden. It was really lovely to see them both and the girls were very excited. I know for my parents this time has been incredibly lonely, and I’m sure this did them good to see us in person.
Since the announcement on Thursday I’ve been constantly thinking about the decision on whether to send Holly back to school or not. I’ve had a lot of sleepless nights, and it has felt like the biggest decision I’ve had to make as a parent. There has been a lot of things for us to consider, and of course we included Holly in the decision. Taking into account at every step, how she feels about it. I won’t go into it all here, but it hasn’t been a straight forward decision for us. But today we finally made the decision to send her.
I know that there has been a lot of judgment towards parents about their decisions, and it seems whatever your decision you can’t do right. Everyone has to make their decision, based on the situation that is happening today. And what is right for their family.
When we told Holly she was going back tomorrow and who was in her class, her little face lit up. She is really excited to be going back and has taken all the new changes in her stride. Seeing her happy, made me feel good about our decision and I just have to trust that we’ve made the right decision for her.
Of course that means a big change for us. Alice will continue to be home schooled by me and when we told the girls there was no upset about it. Holly said to Alice “I will play with you, when I get home” and Alice said “You will have fun at school”. They both just excepted the decision. I’m hoping that now I won’t have to split myself in half trying to teach hem both, I can just focus on Alice more and give her more attention and support with her school work.
It feels like its Holly’s first day at school all over again, and I have butterflies and nerves all over again. I’m sure once we get that first day done, it will start to feel like normal again.